Days move like fingers and toes

Today has been slow. Slow minded primarily. I’ve been sitting around, listening to

music instead of completing the tasks appointed of me. Not the best idea in the world, but I needed a mental break today. The past few days have been thick with newness and junk that I am to learn and absorb and regurgitate later. The lunch with Yoshee was needed as well. Now, I’m feeling a bit more relaxed, and able to focus on the tasks before me; there aren’t too many, but still.

When I get home, hopefully, I’ll be treated to the smells of ground beef being grilled on

our new grill and a newly hung hammock to lie in while eating said beef. Then I can read some, talk some and relax some more, and hopefully go to bed early tonight. I doubt the likelihood of such a thing. Payam told me that he wanted to have a party tonight. He wanted to invite a few people over to eat the ground beef and swing in the hammock. Especially one girl whom he fancies quite a bit. I’m not sure about her though. After all, she likes both the Dave Matthews Band and the Yankees, so I’m not so sure she can be trusted. But it’ll be fine. She’ll come over, and P will present his charm to her. I have a feeling that will work out, and I’m glad for him. He’s a great dude. As for me, I…don’t think that I’m really even looking. There have been women around, but I’m not attracted to them in the same ways I would like to be attracted to someone. The kind of feeling you get when you find some common ground and not on cars or jobs or money. Something more visceral (Yes, please, no need to point out that cars are visceral, ass) than those things. Something like an experience. (Shrug) Perhaps I’ll hear a good story tonight about something random, and I’ll listen and digest it for later. I always love a good story, and someone who’s eyes stay on you while holding conversation.

The blogger has been bothering me all day. Claimed that there were errors where there were none. Frustrating to say the least.

Mitch Hedberg 1968-2005

This is a really sad note. This guy was hilarious, and will be missed. Sad. I remember seeing his Comedy Central Presents Special for the first time, and rolling on the ground when he talked about ducks. A true genius he was.

Terri Schaivo 1963-2005

How quickly will this story disappear? Call me terrible, but I'm guessing pretty quickly. Probably a week or two. This is an issue for one family who was dragged into the public eye by hypocritical political figures who wanted to raise their points in the polls. It's a shame that they had to be put through all this, but primarily for her husband. He was dragged through the mud for this. Called a murder and a liar by people he has never met. It's disgusting what they did to that man for trying to follow the wishes of the wife he loved. I'm sure glad that there are so many people in the world who are that much more morally sound than this poor man to be equip to judge him. Congratulations you heartless jerks. I'm sure that your religious leaders will back you though. After all, you all have the right to judge everyone because you're just so freakin' godlike.

No more about this. I promise.

It begins again. Can we have former President Bush come back in a take the presidency and be governor of Florida seeing as how his sons have screwed everything up, and are ignorning the people they're supposed to represent?

Wah?!?

I, uh, agree with the fat guy in the Ramones shirt.

I wrote a really depressing post about missing people, but deleted it. Started thinking about becoming carnival folk to be closer to someone. Maybe I made a mistake a few months ago. Maybe I regret my decision every day. Maybe I need to stop thinking about this before I start to cry.

Traffic was bad this morning. I saw a strange man driving a "_C_OOL BUS". Yes, he had painted over the 's' and 'h' to make the bus more interesting, but probably just frightened children with the bull skull attached to the grill. It was really quite amusing. I wish I had my camera.

The man has jowls

The Reverend Jerry Falwell is dying.He’s actually on a ventilator in critical condition. I’m wondering how long it will take for people to blame his condition on Muslims, gays and people who get abortions. I mean, its not like he was fat, insufferable and a complete bigot or anything. That couldn’t have contributed to his current condition. He lived a blessed life, or something.

Honestly, I hope that he recovers with a new found fervor for hating people for no reason other than their faith and because that they disagree with him.

To her frightened demeanor

As I walked back to my desk I noticed the new woman who works directly behind me.

She looks confused at the keyboard as if asking for instructions; pressing keys with careful single-finger movements. About two hours ago she introduced herself to me; Deborah, I think. Since then, I’m moved past her a few times on my way to Heather’s desk or the washroom. She always looks up when I return with a furrowed shrug, like she knows that she’s supposed to do something but she’s not sure what. Every so often I hear a quick breath and a pause. That lingering non-statement of hope that she hasn’t done something wrong. Not so shortly there after, she chews on ice from a Dixie cup and starts on the keyboard again. Premeditated ‘clacks’ that she hopes will produce the quota she’s supposed to reach.

Much earlier today I heard that she was a temp in the truer sense of the word. She and

another woman from membership discuss how she will only be here for two days to complete the workload prescribed of her. She replied with an almost faked assurance, that she knew what she was doing and the task would be complete. Since then it’s hard not to hear her question herself. Which program was it again? A stuttered hand moving to click and drag, file>open>Sessions2005.xts. Wrong file.

After a lunch with Heather, at which she spoke in a continuous stream of words with but a few seconds in between to breath and swallow her food, and another meeting regarding some programs I should know, similar situation minus the food, I am massively pooped. I doubt that I’ll post much today. Unless, I start thinking about some weird subject and can’t stop myself from pointlessly vomiting on the keyboard. It is at this point where I turn to the random bits of work I need to take care of, and my constant yawning.

They should bring in some cots for nap time.

I'd really like to see Kung Fu Hustle. I've heard good things.

Wow, Blogger is giving me some trouble. Last night I couldn't access my account at all, and it took me half hour to log-in this morning. Please fix the bug. ...Please

Addition: Still having problems loging on. Stupid thing. Perhaps I should try sending in my posts via email. Hmm...

Thoughts of Baltimore or Shuffle Shuffle

Since I have yet to hear whether my job is secure or not I’ve begun thinking out my

options. Last week I spoke with Tom about where I am, about Lesa’s total incompetence and the idea of getting her fired. He began hinting that a job at LWW, our publisher, wouldn’t be such a bad idea. That I could do Lesa’s job, and that I should keep the idea in my mind for later. Truth is, Baltimore wouldn’t be too bad. I have family out there, their office is in the Ballpark at Camden Yards (they’re on Camden Street) and the music scene is pretty bumpin’. The only real problem was the real draw for me to transition down to Texas, a roommate and friends at hand. I’m not doubting my ability to make new friends in a city like Baltimore, it’s more that I could shrugging off the friends I have here in Texas like I did those in Chicago. And I’m not so sure I can do that. I miss those folks up there. A lot of them were really great friends who I would feel honored to have make comments at my wedding, only to have the mic turned off while they told a story about me jump kicking a copier or something like that. Down here, I’m starting to have those same bonds. P and V are good kids, and when Shahed visits it’s like “the lime and the mango having the love”. It’s just a weird situation with weird twists and shouts and annoying neighbors who don’t speak English. I guess that’s life though. The way of the world. Shift and run and sit and shift and run. I guess I’m just concerned where I’ll end up, and what kind of person I’ll find myself and with whom. So many decisions to make without an end in site, and the prospect of moving to Baltimore to work for a medical publishing company; to take the place of a woman who knew nothing about publishing, but has her masters in it.

I suppose I’ll be riding the wave on this one, waiting for it to settle on the shore.

Cryptic much?

Upon finding out that several people here are sharing their iTunes play lists.

P.S. That is one crazy looking kid. How much do you want to bet that they just showed him/her a picture of Mr. Triller Himself.

Because children know so much more than Mr. Schiavo. Of course. These kids, who claim that they told their parents they wanted to go to the hospice that holds Mrs. Schiavo to give her water even though the only thing she can swallow is her own saliva, know so much more than her husband and scores of doctors. They know that he wants to kill his wife despite his tears and grief stricken face. Problem is it's doubtful that these kids even suggested such a thing, or have any idea what it would be like to have your wife lie there, completely unaware of the world around her. It probably all lies on the parents. The parents who are anti-abortion activists and, in the case of one man, a convicted rapists and kidnapper. These people are the moral epicenters of the world, their beliefs and statements shape everything and we should just sit in awe and watch as they perform "the Lord's work" to "save this woman."

This whole thing is insane. People who claim that Mr. Schiavo wants to kill his wife are stupid. They don't know him, they know nothing about him, have problem never been in a similar situation and their "faith-based crusade" is fundamentally flawed. These are fundamentalist Christians who are judging this man. Oh, right, “judge not lest ye be judged.” Remember that whole thing? Selective Christianity, that’s what these people’s problem is. They say that they’re doing “the Lord’s work” despite the fact that Jesus told the world that you shouldn’t judge people unless you’d like to be judged. Luckily for us, one of those who went down to the hospice was judged a while back, and he is a rapist. These are the exemplars, right? It’s all just stupid. Leave the man alone to his grieving you hyenas and “think-you-are” saviors of the world. In your eyes the savior of the world came and went, and he didn’t leave you in charge.

Actually, my favorite people in the middle of this are Tom DeLay and Jeb and George W. Bush. I mean wow. How hypocritical can you get? Tom DeLay pulled the plug, literally, on his own father; Jeb wanted to send in the state guard to take custody of this woman who he doesn’t know and knows very little about; and our president who, when governor of Texas, signed a law making it ‘okay’ for hospitals to pull the plug on people in comas if the families of said comatose patient cannot afford to keep them there. In fact, a month ago, a child was pulled from an incubation chamber and killed because of this very same law. Hypocrisy Hooray!

Don’t mind the guy on the other side of the wall

If he’s loud we’ll release the hounds

About half hour ago, while in a meeting with Heather two women moved fluidly into the

cube behind me. One of the women begins to explain how the computer is set up for her to use, but the phones will take another day or so to hook up. Heather and I looked at each other. The women then talks about how she needs to go get her some canned air to blow the dust off the desk, to clean up a bit. Heather leans in and says that the woman speaking is from Membership something, and asks if I was told that someone would be moving in. I say ‘no.’ The other woman then thanks her, and the primary talking woman beelines out of the cube; she doesn’t make any eye contact with either Heather nor I (we’re staring right at her).

Now, I’m confused. I know that I’m still ‘just a temp,’ but shouldn’t I be told that

someone is going to be sitting in the cube behind me before she moves in? The woman who sat at that desk, Pat, knew a week before when I was coming in. She had time to prepare. I mean it’s not absolutely necessary. Just courteous. Not only this, but the woman who now sits behind me has yet to utter a word. She hasn’t said hello or opened her mouth audibly enough for me to hear. It’s just kind of weird.

I have this feeling that the week is going to tangent in about a hundred different

directions, and I’m going to look confused for most of it. Maybe I should start drinking tea in the mornings to give me a quick but small injection of caffeine before I get here to be befuddled but the goings on.

Coming Soon! Walk around phone booths!

On Thursday I went to Freebird’s for my once-a-week burrito fix. The joint is laid out

like a traditional cafeteria with multiple people taking people’s orders. You walk up, tell the person what size and kind of tortilla and they walk you down the line asking you what you would like on your burrito. It’s a pretty efficient way of running things, as they’re able to service ten people at the same time with around thirteen workers taking care of customers, cooking and ringing up the order. This coupled with the fact that their burritos are amazing makes the eating environment pretty unique.

All right, so I’m done writing a review of the place and will get right down to it. As I’m

standing there in the twenty person long line someone behind me recognizes someone who is having his order rung up. It seems like a your basic “long-time no-see” situation, but it’s not. The man behind me asks how the other guy is doing. I’m expecting the basic small talk crap that you usually get during those one-touch conversations in public places. The now rung up guy explains that he had a divorce, and he’s lost a lot of weight. Guy behind me responds, “I was going to say, you look great.” “Yeah, that’s what a divorce will do to you,” quips the holding his burrito bag in his left hand guy. He then proceeds to expound upon his experience. I look around at the people around me, and they are not shocked or are at least not displaying shock. Personally, I am. How can anyone speak so candidly about something so private? Has the state of divorce become so blasé that no one is surprised that people are talking about it in a public place…loudly?

Obviously, the length of time at which the divorce took place would play a fact, but I

could never see it as just something that happens. A situation as basic as, “We bought a dog,” or “I flew out to L.A. to visit family.” Those are basic conversations; the kinds people have on cell phone at bus stops or while taking a smoke break outside of the hospital in December. Nothing about them is unexpected but normal. You expect that kind of banter everywhere you go. Perhaps it has less to do with the state of divorce and instead has cell phone use at its center. Those candid conversations that we generally have in privacy driving or in our homes have moved in to the public forum. Maybe people are just embracing that kind of frank speaking. Incorporating it into their everyday. If so, these interactions will become normal. We will all talk about whatever we choose where ever we are, ignoring the obvious nakedness we present ourselves to. I will know more about the people around me than I wish to know. What diseases they have, who they have been with and how they feel about their boss. It’ll all just blend, and be ignored by the masses like a homeless person begging for change during rush hour.

Normalcy is being taken to new lengths, and I’m frightened by that.

Thank you Blogger lag. It didn't just take me a half hour to log-in or anything.

Amendment: For some reason I’m enjoying having my entries post more than once due to some very odd errors. Dagtarnit.

Buy David and Payam tickets to Rangers games!
At the very least to the Rangers/Houston weekend. I mean seriously. I need it!

The sound of cars moving past the window in March

Its pretty gross out right now. Sky is gray. Rain is still sprinkling. Sweater weather.

Glass is full of water. The list of things to take care of today is still pretty long; haven't done much. I'm looking through some of the pictures I've taken since I got here. There aren't many, but what I do have is pretty basic. Random shots of our furniture, a shot from our balcony about ten minutes ago and shots from when we broke the Fast at the Chinese buffet a few weeks ago. But like I said, pretty basic. Lately I've had people ask me to take pictures of Arlington and send them over to them. I 've thought about it, but I'm not so sure I would know what to take. Pictures of the ballpark or Six Flags, both about a mile away. Perhaps some shots of the complex that I live in. I'm never sure, so I've been limiting myself. In the next few weeks, when the weather gets better, I'll try to see if I can take some new shots and post them somewhere.

Until then, I guess the rest of the day is pretty bust. I'm thinking that going out to go

grocery shopping wouldn't be the best idea. I'll probably just hang out here, and watch college basketball. Yep.

Hello, and welcome to the brand new layout for my blog. If you can't read things very well, feel free to tell me and I can see what I can do. Thanks!

Things are getting way out of hand now.

If you haven’t already read the article linked I’ll give you a short version. Jeb Bush, the President’s brother, has decided that he makes all decisions. That’s pretty much it. All the decisions for every person should be made by or inspected by Jeb Bush. First he tried to seize Terri Schiavo after a judge denied the request to have the feed tube replaced. He actually wanted to take control of her, and shove the feeding tube back in. When that didn’t work he decided that I should appear as the hero. Yes, call in the state police to seize her. What? Yeah, believe it. Read the article. None of this makes any sense. After doing polls, speaking with Congress and court cases everyone decided that Mrs. Schiavo was not go have her feeding tube put back. Apparently, Jebby has decided that he’s far more important than all of those. Including the people of Florida to whom he is to represent.

In summation, Bush is in office, his brother is running 2008, and the Bush family has official become the crown rulers of the U.S. Mandate, son. Mandate. This is the new Bush doctrine. If the Bush’s don’t like a court ruling, they can overrule it. If the people disagree with the Bush’s, they’ll just ignore them.

I'll try to write something this weekend, or plug in some interesting news stories from various news sources like this one about who I call the 'Sour Face Man'. I also need to edit the formate of the page. I'm getting bored with the current layout and colors. Blarg on the blog. Have a great weekend. I'm off to the DMV.

Wonderboy?

Has Tom been looking at what is written on the inside of my underpants?

Just got off the phone with our librarian, who is doing all the work that would drive me

mad, informing her of new funness for her to work on. In the next month she needs to compare what I have for gaps in our journal online with what has been printed. To explain, on our site we have articles that have been printed in our journal. The problem is not all of the articles that are printed are online. Now, our hands are tied on a few years of journals as we wait for Google to finish scanning the issues we sent over to them (they’re 2/3 of the way done, woo!), but for some reason there are gaps in articles that should be online and, obviously, are not. These are journals from between 1996 and 2000. So, over the past few weeks I’ve isolated, by comparing what is on our site to what is listed on Pubmed’s site (Pubmed is a website hosted by our content host that expounds every article that they can get there hands on from every journal that they also host; quite a long list), which gaps there are and which articles should be there. However, and here’s the tricky part, there are some obvious omissions of certain articles from even Pubmed that we need to isolate. This is where our librarians come in. They have been charged with the task of comparing what I have compiled to what is in the actual, physical journals. This doesn’t sound too hard, you may think, but we’re talking about five years from each of our five journals. And with twelve or more issues per year (There are fluctuations because Circulation publishes multiple issues per month), that can add up to a lot of issues.

That was a very round about way of explaining everything to get to the real point of

this post. Nice! So, anyway, I was explaining the task that I have thrust upon her. The conversation went off on a few tangents, and ended up talking about the fact that I’m a lowly temp. I informed her, which I don’t believe that I’ve mentioned on here yet, that I’ve been told that Stephen, current Director and come May V.P. of Publishing, has been contemplating expediting the process that would make me a man…I mean, a full-time employee of the AHA. This would mean that I might be a full-time employee here come mid-April; which, would mean that I could go to both the HighWire and HBX conferences and training sessions in Palo Alto and L.A. respectfully. I’m not putting too much stock in this, however. I’m sure that Stephen is far too busy preparing to move up the ladder than to busy himself with David’s whining about still being a temp and not being able to go to California. She then says, “I was in a meeting with Tom earlier today, and he referred to you as ‘Wonderboy.’” Bah? I always thought that Tom thought of me as a decent employee that gets the job done but really isn’t that great. If, in fact, Tom does think of me as a sort of ‘Wonderboy’ then perhaps I should be optimistic about all this. Perhaps Stephen really is interested in accelerating the process of becoming full-time, and that I will, come April, be flying out to California for two conferences.

Prosperity, here I come…hopefully.

For everyone who didn't watch the Daily Show last night, I offer you the following link to a website with a clip. Enjoy:

In QuickTime format

In Windows Media Player format

I’ve been invited to go down to Austin for the weekend. It seems that someone named

Roya has won a giant party at some fancy restaurant for her and fifty of her friends, and I’ve been asked to be one of those people. I’d love to go down to Austin to hang out with many of the people I really enjoy hanging out with, especially a week after SXSW has concluded, but I’m not so sure this will be something I will partake in. After all, I’m exhausted, trying to lessen the amount of money spent, needing to spend a few hours cleaning the apartment and organizing my desk, attempt to figure out my two state tax forms and so forth. The list is actually quite extensive, yet I’m still thinking about going. I would enjoy myself while I’m there, but not on the drive down – four hours in a car with Vafa is no good, I mean, I love the kid, but I’ll be wanting to sleep and he’ll keep waking me up with some nonsensical something about something else.

After looking over the weather for this weekend in Arlington, I’m now leaning more

towards going. 82 today, 76 tomorrow and 63 Sunday is far more appealing than 71 today, 52 tomorrow and 58 Sunday. Hey, thanks weather. Way to try to make my decision for me. I say pewee to weather. I’ll go get my new license and a box of screws to put together the table and chairs that are to be assembled outside to sit and enjoy the nice weather tonight while reading a book or something, and turn the heater for tomorrow and Sunday to play NBA Street Vol. 2 and MVP MLB Baseball ’05. See, I know how to throw…down.

I currently have red bags under my eyes. Like I’ve been in a constant boxing match for

the past few weeks with too many blows to the head. For some reason, I’m just not able to sleep. I get to bed early, wake up the usual time and I’m exhausted and look like crap. Doesn’t make much sense. Perhaps I’ll have to take a little Ny-quil. I don’t like the idea. Quite frankly, it’s a frightening thought that the only way for me to get a good night’s sleep is to take a sleeping aid. I’ve never had that kind of problem before, and I’ve never felt like I’m this sleep deprived in my whole life; that includes the three times I pull all-nighters in college.

I’m wondering if it has something to do with my R.E.M. sleep stage. As if I’m unable to

reach that stage regularly during the night, and am instead floating around pre-R.E.M. Based on what little I know about sleep and sleep dynamics it seems plausible, but like I said, I don’t know much. Hopefully someone who reads this can explain to me why I’m having this problem. Sleep apnea perhaps? Maybe my body has too many ‘repairs’ to be doing it the sleep state.

Regardless, it is becoming increasingly difficult to continue to keep 8-5 work hours

when I’m always yawning and thinking about putting my head down on the desk for a nap. I’ll try to get out of here a bit early today to get my Texas drivers license, and get to sleep early.

Uhh, Fergie, you're scarying the children.
She looks like a ghoul.

DINOSAURS!!!

Play that funky santoor brown boy. Play that funky santoor right.
Lay down the boogie, and play that funky santoor 'til you die.

Son, I don't mind that you left the doors to your $100,000 killing machine open. All that matters is that you're baseball equipment is safe.
STUPID!
Maybe they make too much money, indeed.

This whole thing bothers me a bit. I’ve never understood why so many republicans in

the Senate have such a huge problem with anyone but them using the filibuster on the nominations of judges. Here’s the thing, Democrats have the right to filibuster judges if they don’t agree with a Republican nomination. In fact, it’s their duty as a Senator to do so. It’s what they’re supposed to do. What’s great is that I was checking in on a couple of the judges rep. were trying to push through. One of the judges believes that (this is my understanding of what they said) slavery was the best thing that ever happened to white people. Another believed (again, this is my understanding) that a woman’s place was to please her husband. Those are pretty archaic beliefs for judges who would preside over any part of the law. Actually, I would expect this from a Mississippi circuit court in the ‘60, but never any court now. Especially a high court. My favorite quote from the article is this, “’If the Democrat Party continues this, they are going to pay another price in '06,’ said Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina.” Wow. That’s a threat, if I’m not mistaken. Another great quote is from the beckon of morality and ethical stand points, Trent Lott, “If they don't stop this and we don't come up with some reasonable solution, we will just have to get it on.” Oh, Trent Lott, you’re such a hate-filled man. I love you.

I heard about this on NPR yesterday, and was extremely impressed; because, there is a difference between the overly patriotic, attempted brainwashing by the military and the government and the respect that this memorial shows to the soldiers who have lost their lives in this war. It’s more about the people fighting and less about those who are taking credit for those battles fought.

On the short term in straight line

I’m on a conference call right now. I’m exhausted for some reason. Got a bit of sleep last night, around seven hours, but I’m still tired. I always am. This weekend is going to have to be power nap and extended sleep central. Blinds drawn, Nyquil taken, head down. Still on mute because of the coughing. Hasn’t gone away. Lots of yawns.

Got to speak with Jenna last night for a while. Made me happy. I miss that lady a lot. Been thinking about her a lot. Honestly, I’m glad to hear that she’s so happy.
Laundry needs to be done today. Need to find out how much is left for payoff on my truck. Need to figure out why Great Lakes hasn’t sent me anything about my student loans. Need to figure out why our phone line no longer works; I hate our cable, internet and phone provider. Need to clean up my desk at home. Need to vacuum, sweep and wipe down the counters in the apartment. Need to find a new nice other than Nintendo. Need to play drums…badly. Need to stop drumming on my steering wheel; my hands are always red after I do that, hit so hard. Need to have a conversation with Lisa Carter about doctors in the area. Need to investigate eye doctors in the area; get some new contacts and glasses. Need to get my Texas drivers license. Need to not spend as much money as I have been.

And that’s all the stuff I need to do outside of work. While I’m here the list is even longer. Damn.

In stark contrast to my last post, I offer this (the subscription is free, come on). Science is an amazing thing. Can you imagine what will happen if they develop a telescope so powerful that we'll be able to see civilizations or water on planets outside our solar system. It's amazing.

This will not appeal to those who believe that the theory of evolution is the work of the devil. I'm not sure I will ever understand how it's possible for people to make such broad sweeping decisions. "Sorry, because me and the other people I know disagree with the theory of evolution I can't allow anyone in the entire steate to see this film." Why?! Evolution, as bad as it gets. Pornography, not as bad. Why didn't they do something when the Blair Witch Project come out? That thing had witchcraft in it. Are they suggesting that witchcraft is not as bad as the theory of evolution. Puritanical stupidity is bliss.

David no happy

Last week I made mention to Heather that the fax machine is still pumping things out every once in a while. Since then, this woman drops by my cube once or twice a week to see if there are any new faxes. Problem is she never says a damn thing. Not hello, doesn’t knock. Just walks in rummages through the paper on my desk and walks off. It’s truly astounding as this is my desk. I’m pondering looking over and saying ‘hello’ the next time she decides she needs to thumb through the papers on my desk, and saying that she should show me where her desk is so that the next time something is faxed over I can bring it over to her. She doesn’t look like the type of person who will accept such a remark. Quite honestly I doubt she’ll even respond to me, verbally, when I say hello. She’ll probably just look up, smile, and walk her ass out. Kind of pisses me off a bit. This is my desk, if I’m not mistaken. I’m hear every day working my ass off, and that should be enough for this woman to at the very least say hello.

It's cloudy and windy today, in the low 60s.
With a wind advisory until tonight at ten p.m.

I’m tired of Tom DeLay portraying himself as a martyr. He’s not. He’s also not the

moral and religious compass he claims to be. He should also keep his religious beliefs to himself instead of forcing them on others and presenting them as fact that we should all prescribe. His stance in the Terri Schiavo issue is recessive of this. Even though her husband, who has to right to make the decision to pull the plug, has made his decision Tom DeLay, in his infinite Christian wisdom should be the one making the decision; because he’s Tom DeLay. He is the exemplar. Even though in the past month several ethical and moral problems have surfaced around him, and people are beginning to realize that the man is as corrupt as they come. As well, if I’m not mistaken, his party buys into the idea that there should be smaller government, and that the freedoms of people are of the utmost importance. Uhh, this doesn’t sound like a smaller government to me or that people’s freedoms are important. Only our representatives’ freedoms are important. They should be the one’s to decide if this woman lives or dies and they should be the one’s to decide if I get my medication (because in many of their minds diabetes is a sickness that God bestows on those who He is punishing for not being ‘proper Christians’). If I’m not mistaken there were other religions in this country other than Christianity, and, for some reason, way too many people seem to forget that. It’s as if they ignore other religions, shove them into an ‘other’ category of ‘lesser’ beliefs that are wrong. Actually, it seems as though that whole section of the Constitution that talks about freedom of religion only pertains to those who are Christian, and that all other faiths should just accept Christianities superiority. It truly boggles the mind. The idea of religious freedom means that we should be able to practice our religions freely without the government becoming involved and telling us what is wrong and right.

Sorry if that sounded angry or extremely ‘left.’ Truth is, I’m neither angry nor ‘left.’

Political parties are stupid, and only create more problems and needless separations

between people.

Great news, no Palo Alto for me.

Liabilty my ass.

By the way, I went car shopping on Saturday with Shahed. Got to test drive both types of Volvo S-40. Me likey. Too bad the dude trying to sell me the car wouldn't just let me think about it. It's those kinds of dudes who lose sales to the guy who after hearing, "Yeah, I'd like to crunch some numbers and sleep on it for a few days," respond with, "Sure, you just make sure you give me a call in a couple." Don't sound so desperate, son. You're a car dealer after all.

The difference between David and not-David

In April I'll be going to Palo Alto for a conference/boot camp with HighWire, our content

provider. Or so we hope that's what will be happening. After speaking with Heather, my immediate boss, it's unclear whether or not I'll be able to go; due to my current status as 'temp'. The idea that this decision rests on the fact that this institution couldn't let me on as a full-time employee right off the bat bothers me a bit. In fact, this wouldn't be an issue at all if I were a full-time employee. As well, I would be able to go to L.A. in late April for another boot camp type scenario with HBX, the stats gathering company we use. Both of these camps would make my job a lot easier, but the uncertainty makes me wonder if I will ever become full-time staff. I think I deserve it. I've done my job well to this point, I've made sure that materials are completed at a swift pace and I don't spend as much time as I could possibly spend writing up posts for this thing. That last issue alone should warrant full-time status and a raise...or something. Yet, I still have this thought in my mind that I'll be let go soon. That come May, when Stephen moves on up to the VP desk in the other building and they hire a new Director, I'll be shown the door. I'm expendable, after all. I wouldn't have been here long, and I'm young. To them those two things will probably make the decision for them. For me, it's a different issue. This is the first time in five months that I've had health insurance. For a guy who has type-1 diabetes, it's not entirely inexpensive to be a diabetic without insurance. In fact, as it stands right now I pay about $50 a month on medical related expenses. Before I got the insurance, I was spending around $150 and up per month. There's a huge differential here that I'm frightened of. And again, I wouldn't know where to go next. I moved down to Texas because they convinced me that I would become full-time in around three months. If that doesn't happen, I'm not exactly sure where I'll be.

My gleaning from this weekend

If you think I’m mean perhaps I should introduce you to whom I speak

If a girl who likes you but that you don't like at all calls and says, "I really want to watch a

movie," and you respond by saying, "Then go do that," this means that she is going to end up at your front door, will knock over a glass of water onto the floor next to your box of DVDs that you were nice enough to get for her and will attempt to make out with you on the couch. She will then tell you that she "really thought you were cute the first time she met you," and you will not care at all because you're too wrapped up in the movie. After which, she will never leave, even after telling her that you need to go to bed, the apartment and will decidingly follow you into your bedroom.

In summation, country music singer girls need to get the hint, even after you hit her with it

repeatedly like using a toothbrush to crack a nut, that when someone tells you that you're a "psycho for wanting to shoot everyone" and that you are, and I quote, "stupid" then the dude is not interested, at all; not even a little bit.

With all this said, I hope I never see or hear from this bitch ever again, and I’m saying ‘bitch’

in the meanest way possible; because, and you should have guessed this while reading this post, I absolutely detest this bitch. Damn, I want her to just go the hell away.

This will be the only post I leave regarding the Terri Schiavo issue. If the whole family is saying that Mrs. Schiavo would have wanted the feeding tube removed then they should follow the wishes of the family; because, they reflect the beliefs and wishes that she held as well.

I would also like to point out that we, the American public, need to realize that it's no longer the job of the congress nor the president to represent us, the country's majority, but to make us believe they so represent us. If they represented us, these stats wouldn't be a reality.

Because my ear was getting hot

Immediately after publishing this post, I exited the conference call and hung up.

I got a D in Probability and Statistics, how did I get roped into this?

Currently, I’m on a conference call, on mute, listening to a presentation of the new

information about some software we’ve invested quite a bit of our funds. The new functions aren’t too impressive as I guarantee there will be errors like woah for the first month or so. What I’m interested in see is what kinds of active segments (I’m working with a statistical analysis program focused on website traffic and data. Active segments apply as many filters as you deem necessary to the data. So, basically, if I want to know how many people viewed the Circulation Journal site on February 12th who are viewing the site from an edu address in Berlin, Germany I can do that. It’s pretty fascinating stuff if you’re completely lame like I am right now.) different companies are using. Thus, giving me a better idea what I might add or utilize for our own active segments to better vest our time and blah blah blah.

Every minute or so the sound of people entering the call presents itself over the line, cutting

the presenters voice out for a millisecond. I find it a bit annoying even though I was late entering the call, and must have done the same thing when I entered the call.

I’m glad I’m on mute because I’m coughing and clearing my throat often, and it’s not pretty.

Maybe I shouldn’t have eaten that burrito with the extra salsa. Or perhaps I should have added a drink to the order to insure that my breath won’t kill the people I speak with – although I doubt that will happen on a day when my entire department is off to meetings in Jackson, Mississippi until Sunday – as my breath is no doubt destroying the ozone layer.

Perhaps after the call I’ll stay on to speak with the gentleman who is presenting. Maybe I’ll

be able to supply some input into what kinds of new additions I’d like to see in their program, but I’ll probably return to my other work and ignore ‘web analytics’ for the time being. Probably until…Monday morning.

Realizing that I need to start calming down

Before I left to drive down here I dropped my car off at the dealership to do some scheduled maintenance, and found out there were some problems that needed to be corrected before I made the fifteen hour trek. My rear tires were nearly bald and the tire rods were about to break. Not to outdo that, the carcass was actually showing on one of them, the rear left. Bought new tires, but didn’t feel too comfortable paying $800 for new tire rods any time soon as they weren’t a necessity. Now, I’m starting to notice the rods. When I break sharply, which is a constant down here, the car pulls extremely. Quite honestly, when I break at a light, sometimes, the car pulls under the stress. So, I’m faced with the awful truth that I’m going to have to shell out the cash to repair the tire rods. Not to mention the $450 owed to Payam and his parents for the bed and desk. Oi.

The University of Warwick presents their Trampoline Club

Couldn't make this up if I wanted to.

Shelter your eyes children, or you’ll go gay

I wonder what we’ll denounce now

Currently, there is a movement in Congress and the House to suggest that SpongeBob

Squarepants promotes homosexual lifestyles, and these bodies’ belief is starting to affect communities. As expressed in the article linked above, the school district has yanked a video from classrooms because SpongeBob is in the thing. I should also note that the name of the video is “We Are Family,” and promotes unity and equality. Go watch the video and tell me that anyone is promoting homosexuality. They’re not teaching our kids to be gay, they’re trying to teach our kids that they should accept people for who they are, and that the world is one large family. But that’s a bit too gay (gay as the form suggesting euphoria) for the school district.

The idea that a cartoon sponge who “lives in a pineapple under the sea is in any way, shape or

form homosexual is insane. Not only do people need to realize that this is a cartoon show that makes little to no sense half the time, but they also need to accept that there isn’t a plot to convert our children into mindless, gay zombies. There is also no plot to create alien-human hybrids like in the X-Files or a Flyman like in the movie The Fly. Quite honestly, I’ve seen the show, and I like it. It’s based on an absurdst look at the cartoon genre that is based on the absurd. The only difference to this and the cartoons these dinosaurs used to watch is that this show is a lot less linear than the shows from ‘their time.’ I would also like to point out that SpongeBob isn’t the only character to make an appearance in the video, and plays a brief role.

Another complaint I’ve heard is that because these cartoon characters aren’t married, hang out

with other male characters and (the Squidward) embody the stereotypical belief that all gay males are neat freaks. I get it! I must be gay too then! Along with all males in college who live with other males! After all, I live with a male, my friend Payam, am not married and am a neat freak. That must be it. I’m gay, and SpongeBob did it to me. Thank you SpongeBob for making a queen out of me.

I didn't sleep much last night as we had friends stay until around one thirty, and I was supposed to wake up at six. Needless to say I didn't, and showed up an hour late to work. No one cared, but I've been slipping in and out of reality all day.

Sleep.

It's very rare that I think an article on mlb.com is worth completing, but this one was an exception.

I find this article puzzling.

I have a problem with the theory of evolution. Yeah, I bet you didn't know that. Most people have told me that I have to believe in the theory, that it is fact. Truth is, kinda.

More and more, for some reason, I heard about people making some really insane claims about the

state of affairs in the world of the sciences. This revival of the old world mentality that the theory of evolution if completely wrong because in the Bible it never mentioned evolution. It didn't? Hmm, I thought that was the whole point of the stories. What I thought was that the stories in the Bible were to explain to those who read it what lessons were learned in the past, and what changes and growth humans had made. That they served to describe how man was corrupted by material wealth and the praising of idols, and the like, and how we progressed. That's always what I thought. So, if this is true, if the Bible does paint a vivid picture of the growth of humanity, then how does evolution not exist? Confused? All right. Evolution is the theories that over millions of years positive progression takes place; birds grow wings to fly away from predators, certain types of cockroach grow wings to do the same and to reach food while other types of cockroach don’t. That living things progress from point A to point Omega. If that's the definition how can anyone say that evolution does not exist? The Bible shows our "evolution" from the time of Abraham to the times of Jesus. Wouldn't you say there was some positive progression made? I would. I'd even dare to say that we evolved culturally, mentally and spiritually. Looking at where we are right now, I'd say that we evolved even further than where the Bible left off. That we've taken steps in positive directions, most of the time, to arrive closer to that Omega destination; where ever that may take us.

With that said, I'd like to expound (because I'm so great, or some crap) my beliefs of the evolution

of mankind. Do I believe that we came from “monkeys”? Probably not so much. Do I believe that we evolved from "lesser beings"? Sure. We have to have. Even the Bible suggests that we are made of dust and ash. Right? So, there's an obvious evolutionary process that took place for us to get from dust and ash to flesh. However, that doesn’t end at “we evolved from monkeys”. No, it can’t be that simple. What I’m thinking is that we evolved from a single line; a single line (line meaning general genetic make-up) that was destined to reach the point where we find ourselves currently and to continue on evolving. I also believe that this line has always had a soul, was created with a soul, and was the only creature (and currently we are the only living things on this Earth) ever to live that has had a soul. Does that rule out the Bible’s teachings that God created us in his image? No. Does that rule out the theory of evolution? No. It lands smack in the middle. Which is where most of the answers to the easy questions we ask ourselves lie.

But that’s just what I believe.

I started feeling exhausted about an hour ago, so I’m leaving early (4:30). Well, that and I have a huge headache from looking at numbers and pointing out the stupid mistakes of this woman who was supposed to finish this project in December. Is there anyone else who needs me to clean up someone else’s mess? I’m already doing it right now. Might as well take care of your crap while I’m at it. Please, no term papers.

Friday has been dubbed 'Sandwich Eating Day' by 3/4 of the population of this country. ...CNN is reporting it. Go check on their...you know, they're site. While I...devour this sandwich.

My Fasting regrets

Over the past week I’ve been sick with the flu then bronchitis, and I’ve been completely unable

to Fast. As I wouldn’t have been able to in the first place, one might think this wasn’t too big a deal, but it is. Fast isn’t just about a abstaining from food and drink from sunrise to sunset, it’s about spiritual cleansing, about clearing out your head to prepare for the New Year, soon approaching, and thus far I’m not feeling very fresh. My mind is still too cloudy, my spirit too stained and my health is a big question as my sugar levels have begun to drop and my units-per-shot ratio has skyrocketed. I need to find a way to Fast in some capacity in order to achieve these ends; because, it’s important to be centered as you approach a new year. There’s necessity in knowing that you’re prepared for the restart of the calendar, and a resuscitation of sorts that will provide that restart. I need to find it. Perhaps this weekend my health will improve similarly to what is going on now. My coughs have decreased their violence and frequency, and my chest and lungs are feeling much more relaxed and pain free. With these steps, perhaps I’ll have a couple of days to Fast in my own way to prepare for the fast approaching new year.

Actually, lately, I’ve been thinking about divesting my time in the diet that I was on when

I was getting my cholesterol checked; no solid food for 24 hours, sticking to juices and jello. The process will hopefully have a similar effect to what others around me are feeling around this time. That their lives will begin anew on Naw Ruz, and they will feel accomplished in doing so. It’s something I plan on attempting if, as I’ve described above, things continue to progress in the ‘right direction.’

So, I got this email telling me that we have a conference room for this call, so I ran my ass

downstairs to get to the room. When I got there, oh, they’re taking the call at their desks. “Damn.” So, I ran back up to my desk to take the call. And now I’m on it right now, and I’m not going to say a damn thing.

"Hello, this is David, I have killed my coworkers and shoved their brains in to my cranium. Ask me any question as I have their combined knowledge base."

In about ten minutes I will be forced to take my first conference call by my lonesome. Now,

there is a stipulation to this, I have taken a conference call of about five people last week, but it's subject matter was the new statistics software we're using and not the livelihood of our journals. This is pretty crazy. Regardless, I'm going to try to be as silent as possible, taking notes on my agenda waiting for the managers to conclude their call with Stephen (the director) and join me on the call; hitting the mute button often to mask my coughing or to take a drink of water. I will also be required to report everything that transpires to the managers and to Stephen to ensure that they stay in the loop. As it stands, I'm sure there will be a lot of talk about Clemson’s win over the Terps of Maryland and the Missouri/Kansas game. I'm sure I'll say something like, "Don't you worry about your precious little teams, I'm sure that University of Illinois will be nice and gentle as they roll over everyone." They'll laugh, but know that I'm right. And I really don't follow college basketball all to closely. Maybe I should call Matthew to get some coaching in before the call. To add to my arsenal of knowing that U of I's record is 30-1 and have the most dominant starting three-some in the tournament. That's...about all I know really. I mean, I saw the last game, the one game they've lost all season, but that doesn't provide me with enough of an umph to throw factoids into the conversation. Actually, I should probably try to steer the conversation back on topic, "so I have some stats for Circ over the past week, and I'll have better numbers by the months end. Aren't I cool?" Then, they'll laugh; because, I'm not. It'll be mocking laughter. That's how they roll out here. And I'm getting pretty used to it. Bring it, and I'll just self deprecate the crap out of myself.

Meeting time!

In related news, I'd like to move to London tomorrow if possible

or at the very least speak with and hug the doctors who performed the procedure

This could be the most important breakthrough in healthcare in the last fify yearsif it works for others.

Is that a fact? Is this possible, or another faux moon landing theory?

I like this article for many reasons. For one, it’s written by a great SI writer Jacob Luft. But more importantly, he mentions one of the greatest television shows on the planet as the name of the stadium he creates. Nice.

To end the work day

For lunch I ate an amazing sandwich from Baker Brothers. I should probably move closer to one.

Small steps

I suppose this is a step in the right direction or double entendre

There are going to be a lot of people confused by this story, so I thought it would be a good

idea to explain. There are many countries across the globe to which having a male child is the ultimate goal, especially first-born children. It is thought that this will help with the longevity of the family name and continue to bring honor to the family. Some of these countries cultures also believe that it can also be bad luck to give birth to a girl if the first-born (or at all for some). In these instances, it has become normal, although the number of these events has significantly dropped in the past twenty years, for families to kill this first-born daughter so that no one will know that they were ‘unlucky,’ hoping that the event will help with the production of a male first-born. Now, I find this disgusting and ridiculous for many reasons. The most obvious is logic based, how are you going to have more children if the population of women is so low. As well, having a child at all is a blessing, no matter the gender. There are thousands of families who are incapable of having children at all, and this ‘custom’ is a slap in their face.

The other issue here is that India has the largest population of any country on the planet

(>16% of the population of the world), having surpassed China a year or two ago. With such a large population the government has begun discussing taking the approach that the Chinese have already instigated by ‘strongly suggesting’ that families should only have one or two children. Luckily, there appear to be many in the Indian government who think that may not be the best way of doing things so things have been stunted at talks. This new reward, said to ‘boost the female population’ doesn’t just do what they’re telling their people, it will also trim the population of the country significantly as poorer families wish to cash in on the ‘reward.’ Yet, you have to also recognize the inadvertent plus to this, the female population will boom, and in the future, perhaps, this will lead to some equality across gender borders; which is paramount.

I’ve pretty much decided on taking the train. Starting on Monday, hopefully, I’ll be taking the train to work everyday. This way, I don’t have to deal with soaring gas prices ($1.85 per gallon), annoying rush hour traffic and a lack of sleep. How is waking up earlier to get on the train for a ride that will take longer going to help to remedy my lack of sleep? Well, it just so happens that I can sleep on the train, thank you; yet, more importantly then that I’ll be forced to go to bed earlier, consistently at 10:30. Now, the only thing that could possibly cause any kind of hindrance on this decision would be remoteness of the train stop from my apartment. If the stop is relatively close, there will be no problem. If it’s relatively far or in a ‘not-the-best’ neighborhood (seriously, this is shoe-stealin’ country out here), this may cause some problems.

As well, I’m thinking about purchasing a cheap bike (or a rocket sled) to use to get to baseball games this spring and summer. Sure it’ll be around one hundred degrees out, but it will still be better than having to drive back and forth in the traffic around my apartment…in one hundred degree weather. Not to mention, the ballpark is only one and half mile from my front door, so I just see this for practicality.

Lastly, this summer I’m going to look in to trading-in my truck for a car. Preferably one with great gas mileage. As it stands, I’m stuck driving around the metroplex (if you’re not familiar with the area it’s a 20.46 mile drive from Arlington to Dallas and a 33.21 mile drive from Fort Worth to Dallas. That’s quite a distance to drive every day, and with my current gas mileage right around twenty or so, I’m thinking I can find something a bit more fuel efficient and yet so badass. Quite honestly, I don’t know how people around here can drive the trucks that they do, unless they’re trying to win some kind of title for Most Gas Wasted in a Single Year. I’m not sure that would be such a proactive title to be given anyway.

On a day at which I still have done nothing, and littered with nothing. I present to y'all the following:

A: All you drivers out there, check this out, and think ‘bus.’ Personally, I'm going to look into the train system they have here. I wouldn't have to go far from the stop out here, it's the stop in Arlington that is my main concern.
B: I'm going to start buying tickets to Rangers games this weekend. Hopefully we'll be able to hook-up the group rates for the six dollar tickets on the first base side. I mean, where else are you going to sit, the nosebleeds? Heck no.
C: I am leaving the office right now. Goodbye.

Purevolume.com has been my salvation while I’m here. People are loud talking to one another about stupid things like TV shows and sex. It gets pretty distracting sometimes. Not to mention the fact that I’m exhausted all ready, don’t feel well and in dire need of some more water and a bed to nap on.

In an effort to ignore my ongoing illness, I’m going to find something else to talk about.
…something else. Something…else. Well, there’s…no. Hmm…You’ll need to give me some time to think about something to write. And perhaps some more ellipses.
Leave comments! I need feedback. I crave it like I crave…ellipse.

I ramble with the best of them

or it was very difficult to be as serious as I was throughout this

Lately, I’ve been trying to figure out my place in the blogosphere. As there are so many of these

little blogs, whether personal or professional, one really begins to wonder about the spread of their readership. In the past few days, I’ve become enamored with AmericaBlog. It’s posts are often and it’s readership high; readers leave comments on each article often running into the high fifties. Even CNN has used it as a source for a few of it’s stories, GannonGuckert being the most resent. But I’m running a personal site. A site solely based on my own writing about myself or topics I wish to discuss. My readership probably doesn’t stretch past myself and a few select friends who I’ve told about this thing. And, for one, that’s a good thing. If other people began reading my posts they may become violently bored by the pointless materials the site houses, or develop some kind of deep seeded resentment for some of the comments I post. And I’m all right with that. After all, I tend not to use the most remarkable grammatical form and ignore some obvious spelling errors; yes, I know that they’re there. The question remains, what is my place in the blogosphere?

Grammatical ignorance aside, I remain a writer by proxy. I have a degree in creative and

professional (basic web design) writing, and find myself in a field that doesn’t require me to use my “talents” as much as I would have hoped. So, I find myself here, posting a blog or two a day (if I’m lucky) to defuse my lust for the clickity-clack of the keyboard or the aesthetics of a mechanical pencil against a sheet in a notebook. I suppose my purpose retains the same quality it did while I was in college, to hone my writing in an effective manner, but has any progress be reached? Am I still just as good as I was almost a year ago? Perspicacity and jargon aside, I’d like to think it has. I’d like to think that my writing has developed in positive ways, as well as negative but I’ll try to remain on the former, and I’m able to better grow thoughts and ideas and to present them in a more precise and succinct fashion. That’s a statement, not a rhetorical question. I really do believe that my writing has improved, vastly.

Now that I’ve tooted my own horn and rang my own bell, I’ll reverse my deviation; what point

does this blog have other than for my own pleasure and posterity? None. There is no other point. I’m writing this for myself, and I’m not sure that I, frankly, give a damn what, if any, effect it may have on the blogosphere. I’m not saying that if people were to read this and it was able to provide some kind of service to them that I would be disappointed, on the contrary. What I am saying is that this site is a provision of myself. It’s a deviation yet convergence of myself, and will, I hope, continue to act as a room of my own (to steal an ideal from Virginia Wolff) for as long as I am able to continue to type (when ever I lose working ability in my hands, for whatever reason) and perhaps beyond.

This is the purpose of and job of this site for me. It is a blog within the blogosphere that is my own

brain. Ignoring its larger capacity as a bank for thought, reason and idea for anyone who wishes to use it, it is, more importantly to me, a bank for my thoughts, reasons and ideas to be stored away instead of dashed against the walls of my own brain. Let me explain, my mind works like a shotgun, to provide as violent an image as any. Ideas sprout up, are loaded up and fired within the confines of my brain. If they’re caught in mid-air by the giant purple monkey (I originally had ‘gorilla in there instead of ‘monkey,’ but decided that ‘monkey’ was funnier) and fed out through my hands or mouth, then great, if not they crash into my skull and are lost. Now, that gorilla is incapable of catching all of those shotgun shells. Many of them are lodged into the bone to be left to rot away, forgotten. Whichever bullets are caught provide me with something to say or write or hope to remember, often to no avail, for later. That’s how I work. The blogosphere is my brain, and the blog and my own gawking jaw are what I’m able to get out of the blogosphere.

How does this pertain to other people’s blogs? First off, other people’s blogs provide me with more

ammo for my brain to fire off wildly. Their ideas can form new ideas for me to talk or write about. Second, and clearly pertaining to this posting, each blog (on the net) is similar to my own blog (the giant purple monkey) in relation to the mass that is the blogosphere. Each blog (idea) makes up this giant working network (blogosphere) that is the working brain.

So, I’ve surmised, while writing this, my blog’s purpose in the world, and all I had to do was waste

a lot of time at work when I could have been sitting around waiting for my boss to call me about this project I’ll be working on next week. And then I realize that this passes for a closing paragraph. Maybe I haven’t made any progress at all…damn, I have the flu and it sucks.

Day-Quil hasn’t made things much better, and I still feel like ‘the poop.’

David: "Man, I am so sick."
Audience: "How sick are you?"
David: "...I wasn't setting up a joke. I have the flu and feel terrible."
Audience: (applaud)
David: “You’re all stupid.”
Audience: (louder applaud) “Yeah!”
David: “God, you’re stupid.”

I guess I ramble like woah

Today’s first meeting has been canceled, as we were able to finish everything up yesterday by three,

and I really have nothing to do save futz around on this site to find errors – I haven’t found any yet. Seeing as how that is amazingly redundant, I’m going to write…something. I swear, I’ll do it. I’m just that crazy.

I’ve been reduced but spread out, if that makes sense. Since I’ve moved out here things have

become one-dimensional. I wake up, eat breakfast, shower, put cloths on, drive to work, work, eat lunch, work, drive home, eat dinner. It’s what happens after that I’m still trying to figure out. Other than the playing of Halo 2, against Payam or attempting to run through the “campaign mode,” I’ve been to a show (Blood Brothers, great to hang with Johnny again; he’s a good guy), appeared on a college radio show (Vafa’s, I played a lot of music people had never heard, I’m pretty sure they had no listeners), watched TV and cleaned the apartment. Things have yet to become as scheduled and demonstratively obvious as people have once told presented to me. I’m all right with that though. Still trying to get acquainted or become antiquated with Texas life. I mean, I shot a bull cow in the head, but that gets old fast (I never shot a bull cow in the head. I couldn’t imagine doing so; the whole idea is pretty gross. Needless to say, I’m not going to stop eat steak and beef because of this; I’m just saying the process is gross. Yet, the only thing that has come close to shooting a bull cow in the head has been my own urge to do so at the party at my apartment this weekend; the very same party that if it weren’t thrown at my apartment, I probably wouldn’t have been invited.). Real fast. In the mean time, I’m sure I’ll come across something. A band or bowling or that lesbian Covent across the street. The truth is, I would welcome some monotony not revolving around sitting on my butt in front of the computer or television (for some reason I felt it necessary to spell television out) as long as it was a persistent monotony. Well, more persistent that what I’ve already listed as “boring things.” Same as it ever was, same as it ever was (song lyrics).

As it stands right now, I have yet to hit a cymbal, tom or snare since I’ve moved out here, and I’m

in desperate need of finding a place where I can do so, feverishly. I’ll probably have to relinquish control of my kit if I am to leave it somewhere; a prospect that frightens me. I’m not big into someone other than me playing on the kit that I bought less than a year ago, and have invested so much of my time and effort into. That’s not entirely mean, it’s just anal; and I’m fine with that. Anyway, it’s lunchtime and I’m thinking about eating a sandwich, then on to meetings until three. BAM!

I get Google updates...then this happened. I right nearly exploded with delight.

Yeah, umm, I like this site a lot for some reason. Anyway, this bothered me a lot. Primarily because I have a disease that could be looked down upon by a pharmacist. If they deny me my medication, I die. There's something fundamentally wrong with turning away the sick because you believe they may or may not deserve that sickness. Maybe they should reread that portion of the Bible that says judge not lest ye be judged.

Does this frighten anyone else?

Foreword

People told me right off the bat that I would have trouble adjusting. Told me that no matter how

much I tried the first few months would be pretty painful, and I would have a lot of ups and downs. Then I got here. Everyone took it back. Told me that I obviously adjusted a lot quicker than they anticipated, and that was great. Truth is, I’m not adjusted. I haven’t gotten used to living here. It’s just easier for me to say that I am and act like I am then to sit around like a stump. My mentality this whole time has been that if I’m proactive, getting out of the apartment as often as possible, meeting people then things would just fall into place. After nearly a month, I’m happy to say that this procedure has begun.

The drive in this morning was easy; despite forgetting my keycard at home. As soon as I hit traffic,

I just didn’t care. I knew it was coming and I was fine with it. I should probably point out that I’ve been having trouble driving to and from work having to deal with traffic. I’m really not all too used to it. It took me about fifteen to twenty minutes to get from my home to my previous employer, and it’s taken me some time to get around that as well. The truth is, this is how I’ve always been. Things are a lot more difficult on me then I actually let on, and there are reasons for why that’s the case. Does that mean I’m going to explain that here, right now? Probably not. But perhaps I can provide some shreds of insight. Maybe it’ll make things easier for others to understand, but more importantly, it’ll help me out to work through things.