I’m pretty exhausted today; yawning consistently, and eyes drooping below the poles.

Stayed up late talking on the phone. I don’t regret it at all. As a matter of fact, I feel much better after having the extended conversation. Made me feel at ease, normal. Like the whiskey crazy people feed babies while their teething that later results in abnormalities. But it’s less of an unconscious change; it’s far more literal than that. It’s good to know that someone out there cares; that they want to talk to you and miss you. I’m right there with them. It’s still weird knowing that I’ve entered this world. Yesterday I woke up and wanted to call in sick. I didn’t feel entirely well, but not entirely poorly either. It was just a lapse of that attitude you have in college. “I don’t have to go to class today, I went on Friday.” Payam’s done that a few times, and it’s starting to rub off on me in the wrong ways. It’s not his fault though, I’m sure he doesn’t have this evil plot to ensnare me in college-life’s vice-like grip. Just my own memory of how much I enjoyed the late nights, conversations and breakfasts at two in the p.m.

There’s really nothing wrong with that either. Speaking with Matthew, I’m sure I would

get the same reaction. It’s great to just relax and have things flow along a relatively determined river. Makes for less focus on certain things, and more on others. The things we all thought were so important, and really are. Sleep, fun, friends, interactions. These are the important attributes of life, they make things bearable.

With all this thinking about the past, and last night’s conversation about what could

have/should have been I get trapped. Then I around in the cube I’m seated in, and realize that there are more things in life than sleep, fun, friends and interactions. The things that many people find absolutely terrifying, and I find enjoyable…most of the time. I suppose I’ll just continue on with the day though. Feet on floor, fingers on keys, mind on numbers and stats. I just hope there aren’t too many brain abnormalities for all this work.