Comes in like the wind

I was pulled aside today to have a conversation with one of my co-workers.

They told me that they were part of the meeting regarding the future of my department and my employment with the AHA. Turns out, I’m just a schmuck. Again. It should seem obvious by now though. I should have been able to tell that I wouldn’t get the position I thought I deserved and wanted. Quite honestly, I’m not sure that I really deserved it. More like, I was told that I would get it, but it turns out they didn’t mean it when they said it. I’m expected to remain where I am, on an island amidst the company. Watching responsibility and any kind of stability move past me like a lobster cage lined with barnacles, rusted shut. It should seem obviously by now. Naïve and nubile are looked over or stepped on instead of applauded and built up. Sharks work, calm heads don’t.

I wish I had my overstuffed red armchair right about now. What’s most

interesting is that the person who divulged this information is the most like me. Probably moved out of the way a few times, looked over because of kindness. The idea that a jaded worker is far more valuable than one with hope kind of sickens me.